Being pregnant is so hard, especially without family, friends, and even strangers asking insensitive questions. So if you know a mom-to-be who’s going it alone, tend not to make her feel inferior. Hence, avoid asking them the following questions…
1. Who’s the father?
Questioning a woman about the paternity of her child is just plain out rude regardless of whether she is single or not. Yes, it might seem like an innocent question to ask, but you don’t know her circumstance, so please just don’t ask this question.
2. Wow—you’re brave!
Not really: you could say the same about anyone having kids. Remember the saying “It takes a village”? Well, that’s exactly what single parents utilize when raising their kids.
3. Will you feel weird about dating?
Does it matter? The dating status of a single preggo shouldn’t be up for discussion. Unless we volunteer this info, consider it NOYB.
4. What’s the plan?
You may think you mean well when you ask a single pregnant woman what her plan is to raise her child, but the better question is, “How can I help?”
5. Are you getting child support?
Child support is a topic few single parents want to discuss. And it’s not even relevant in every single-mom-to-be’s situation (see #1). It’s also possible for people to come up with their own arrangements when it comes to child support, which they might also want to keep private.
6. It must be tough going through pregnancy alone.
Sure, it’d be great to share this experience with a partner. But it is possible to be happy, single, and pregnant. Plus, no partner does not automatically equal no support: There’s family, close friends, friends of family—the list goes one when it comes to the reinforcements single parents-to-be have. The majority of single parents are never alone and there are plenty of resources out there for use when it comes to having (and raising) a child.
I know sometimes, we’ll like to share our compassion towards single mothers passing through the Mom-to-Be stage. But, it’s better not to emotionally provoke them. So, avoid not to ask these questions.